Star dust.: Archive

Dec 1st

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Dec 1st

32 notes

Stacks of unread books and nothing to read? BUY...

kara-thrace-anders:

Dec 1st

4,097 notes

Nov 30th

19,975 notes

Nov 30th

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Nov 30th

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Nov 30th

3,437 notes

Laughing at yourself is the best part of falling down.

Nov 30th

The entire synopsis of Breaking Dawn Pt 1...

 everything is so awkward and forced
 oh god 
 sexy time
 they are taking turns eyeing the bed
 they are going skinny dipping
 I think the presex montage just happened
 she like...shaved her legs and shit
 who doesn't do that before they leave for their honeymoon?!
 come ON
 oh jesus
 BROKEN HEADBOARD
 HAHA
 we are halfway through this film and NOTHING HAS HAPPENED
 they got married and had sex
 literally not a thing else
 they're now playing chess
 fucking hell
 she keeps trying to seduce him and he's laughing at her WORST MARRIAGE
 oooh playing chess again!
 AND AGAIN
 they just had a montage of their honeymoon and all that happened is thye played a lot of chess, she tried to fuck him and he ran away
 oh god she's begging now
 this is honestly awkward softcore porn
 and now she's vomiting into the toilet
 gross
 god seriously
 nothing happens in this god
 it's just a bunch of shitty subplots
 the wolves are so shit
 shit
 lsbgksdg
 THIS IS SO BAD
 weird ass telepathic wolf pow wow shit
 I don't even know what's going on
 THE FETUS ISN'T COMPATIBLE
 I'm really glad that in Twilight world, they make skinny jeans that fit over evil fetus baby bumps
 oh god Bella's drinking blood
 I'm taking a shot
 the cup says FREE REFILLS ON IT
 Bella just chose "renesmee" for the baby's name and this child will be beat up for the rest of it's life
 OH MY GOD SHE IS GIVING BIRTH WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK
 "GET HIM OUT OF ME"
 loads of screaming and flashing and she looks like a skeleton
 aaaand Edward ripped open her stomach with his mouth
 YUP GOOD
 the baby is a bloody mess and they just called it beautiful. I mean, I don't really do babies, but like...I'm pretty sure that just looks like meat
 there is just blood everywhere and edward just stabbed her in the heart with his venom and what the HELL
 Bella seems to have died, but Edward is just biting her everywhere and OH HOLY GOD IT'S SCIENCE
 HER BLOOD IS FREEZING
 the worst thing? Kristen Stewart's face hasn't changed.
 she just gave birth and then died
 without a flicker of emotion
 Jacob has just seen the baby and he's in lo0o0o0ove
 this is the creepiest scene ever
 he just fell to his knees in front of a baby
 I just want to be a fly on the wall during this filming
 uh oh vampire v wolf death match
 oh jk rules and shit
 wolf can't harm future lovers of other wolves
 so much for bros before hoes, shit
 meanwhile, Bella is serving her purpose well. laying on a table with the occasional SCIENCE into her body
 she's becoming a vampire, which apparently includes permanent eyeshadow. so, that makes life easier.
 you know how on tumblr, they have those picture sequences where it slowly gets closer to someones face?
 that was just an actual shot in Breaking Dawn
 jacob, Jacob, JACOB
 AND THEN HAWT VAMPY BELLA OPENED HER EYES WITH MIRACULOUSLY NEWLY LONG EYELASHES AND THE FILM ENDED
 TO CHEERS
 I require the last two hours of my life back
 who do I go for for that